Things I Never Thought I Would Say

Here is a funny list of things I never pictured myself saying when I became a mother. I'm sure as he gets older the things on the list will get funnier and more random. Here's a look at the first year:

1) Baby, my nose is not a nipple, there's no milk in there.

2) Don't eat the carpet.

3) Baby, Mommy loves you but if you don't stop pulling on my bellybutton skin, we can't be friends.
 (while nursing)

4) Don't pick the cat's nose.

5) Please don't eat the cat's fur.

6) That goes for biting the cat too. Don't bite the CAT. Or pick him up by the tail, he's bigger than you. BABY Leave the cat alone. *Thinking: Why won't the cat run away?*

7) Mommy's blush brush doesn't go in the....OH....okay it does go in the toilet. Lets not put things in the toilet.

8) Please stop biting the couch.

9) Did you just LICK me?.

10) Stop sniffing the cats but PLEASE!


Most of these are said on a daily basis...somebody save me?

I was inspired to write this post both by my mother (@mishframe) and a couple Mommas (@AdoTheMomalog & @DanaMacario) I met on Twitter who, at the same time my mother was harassing me to get writing, were creating a linkup with the very same topic! Check out 18 Years to Life for the rest of the "Did We Seriously Just Say That" posts.